I have typed 5 different opening sentences to start this thing. I have also deleted 5 opening sentences. I mean really how do you start a blog like this. A blog that is meant to share with your family and friends, and anyone else who wants to read, your journey through breast cancer. You can't just start with a typical welcome to my page. It seems like it needs to be so much more then that........but maybe, like most things, I am overthinking.
First: Lets just get some "house cleaning" things out of the way. I really, really, stink at grammar, punctuation, and spelling. So if those things matter to you maybe my blog isn't the best option for reading material. I also cannot promise this blog will always be upbeat. The point of it is to share the true journey I am on. This means the good days, the bad days, and the really ugly days may all be exposed at any given time. I also will be discussing parts of my anatomy. Now I hope that regardless of gender you are able to read this if you choose. I don't plan to be graphic but again this is information for my family and friends and I want it to be honest so sometimes I will need to discuss anatomy.
Now that we have that out of the way...........
I was diagnosed with breast cancer September 2nd. To answer most peoples next question........I found it myself. In June I discovered a lump. It was painful and it moved. I of course googled it and found that......Typically cancer does not move and it does not hurt. Yeah, probably shouldn't google medical issues, just go see a doctor. After a few weeks of the painful lump not going away I decided I needed to make an appointment with my doctor. Due to the summer months the doctor was a little harder to get into, so 3 weeks after calling I finally saw my doctor. During these three weeks things about my breast changed. It became misshaped and hard. I also had a lot of pain. So jump back to the first doctors appointment. She thought I had mastitis. Something rare when not breast feeding but it does occur ( I stopped breast feeding 5+ years ago). Despite her thought that it was mastitis she sent me in for a mammogram and an ultra sound. This is where I met an incredible radiologist (the dr. who reads the ultra sound and mammogram) named Cloe Shelton. She later would become my hero but for this day she really just scared me. After looking over my mammogram and ultra sound she came into the little white room and let me know that she was going to suggest medication for mastitis but that I needed to stay on the radar. I needed to be sure I came back in if the medication did not work because the only other thing she could think of that presents like my breast was Inflammatory Breast Cancer, a super rare diagnosis, and even more rare for someone my age. I heard the word cancer and was gone. I couldn't think of anything else. I got in my car and I cried. Begging......god, or something.....to make the medication they were going to prescribe work. I went home and waited impatiently for my prescription to be called in. I started that night and took the pills every 6 hours as prescribed, even though the pharmacist told me I didn't have to wake up in the middle of the night. I did wake up in the middle of the night, I wanted that stuff to WORK!
6 Days Later: Nothing had really changed. My breast was still hard and swollen. The only difference I noticed was that the pain was gone. So my doctor agreed that maybe I should go back in for another ultra sound. The next day I went and I will spare you the feelings I have for the doctor who read my ultra sound this time, or maybe I wont. He was awful. During a moment of tears, on my part, he informed me I was back to soon and that if the pain is gone it is not cancer. Well thank you Mr. Doctor who thinks he knows more then me about my body, I went another 10 days before I was diagnosed with what you said it couldn't be because I was back to soon.
10 Days Later: After a 2nd round of antibiotics, that did not work, I had a 3rd ultra sound and this time Dr. Cloe Shelton was back to read my ultra sound. She was not okay with what she saw after 2 rounds of antibiotics and almost 3 weeks. She sent her team on a mission to find places for me to have a skin biopsy and a lymph node biopsy. Within hours I had both scheduled and one of them would be done by her on her DAY OFF. That's right friends. She was willing to come in on her day off and perform the lymph node biopsy. The reason........ the doctor who would have performed the lymph node procedure because he was in the office the day it was scheduled was Dr. You Came Back to Soon, it's not cancer. When the scheduler told me this is who would be going into my skin with a needle I started crying but agreed because I needed answers. A couple hours later I had a call from the radiology place rescheduling my appointment to earlier so Dr. Cloe could perform it. I am beyond GRATEFUL for that call and reschedule!
Same Day: I was also able to get in for the skin biopsy the same day at my General doctors office. My doctor was out of the office but one of the other Doctors from her practice performed the procedure. This was also an amazing experience. Not because I had a chunk of skin taken from my breast but because the nurse and Doctor were amazing to me. I felt comfortable, I felt like I mattered and I felt like they wanted answers for me as bad as I wanted answers.
24 Hours Later: Before I even went in for the lymph node biopsy I got the call from my Doctor. The skin biopsy was back and it was cancer! I still needed to go in for the lymph node though. So I went and Dr. Cloe had already heard the news. She was amazing, she told me to cry, that it was okay. She told me she cared. She was gentle and performed the biopsy and the lady who was making sure she had enough cells for the reading (excuse me for not knowing what all of these amazing peoples titles are. They worked hard for there degrees and I think they are incredible I just cant keep all the credentials straight.) gave me a hug and told me I would get through this. Dr. Cloe also made special calls to get me into an oncologist that night. Not just any oncologist either, a top notch oncologist who specializes in breast cancer. Dr. Cloe also used her magic to get me into the top surgeon in the area. For this Doctor I am beyond grateful. To top it all off she even sent me flowers. She is my hero at this point and I will never be able to tell her how grateful I am that she cared.
Now: So lets fast forward through lots of test, lots of tears, lots of calls, and even more fear and get to where I am now and what my road ahead looks like. I have had two chemo treatments. They last about 3 hours and I get to sit in a comfy chair and relax. My family gets to sit with me. It's not so bad if you can get past the part that they are basically putting poison in your body to kill something that could kill you.
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| First Chemo treatment- I felt ridiculous taking a selfie but knew I had to document the moment. I document everything else why not this. |
I had this fancy thing called a power port placed in my chest, so instead of having to have my vains messed with every time they just poke into the port. Don't ask me how that works because I can't handle watching or knowing. I just look forward and make small talk while they "access."
I had a life long best friend shave my head yesterday after days of it just coming out in clumps. So now I appear as the picture above shows........without hair.
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| Mild hair picture, this was day one of it coming out. |
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| I mean this was a good look and all but not sure I could have continued to sport it past one day |
